Слободкина Ольга
Why did she?

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  • © Copyright Слободкина Ольга (olga_slobodkina@mail.ru)
  • Размещен: 30/01/2024, изменен: 08/06/2024. 7k. Статистика.
  • Стихотворение: Поэзия
    •   Why did she,
       that acquaintance of mine
      from long ago,
       came to me
      in my sleep?
      
      When I awoke
       I realized
      it was her birthday,
       January the 30.
      
      She has been living in the States
       for over 30
      years from now...
      
      We didn't have a common language,
       but I kept visiting them -
      her and her family -
       back then.
      
      And why?
       Because I wasn't strong enough
      to be alone
       and to admit
      that my wrong marriage
       was all gone
      and I should quit.
      
      
      My life was broken at that time
       and hers was changing...
      
      She changed her husband,
       had a son,
      a lovely one.
      
      And once
       that little boy
      gave me a note:
       I LOVE AUNT OLYA.
      LOVE YOU, AUNT.
      
      He mix`ed up some letters,
       but it was
      the best confession of love
       in my whole life...
      
      We didn't have a common language.
       She was a housewife,
      a wife,
       a mother.
      
      I was another,
       a different heart and mind
      and had some tragedy behind...
      
      She couldn't see my talents
       (why should she!)
      being absorbed
       all by her housework.
      
      I felt relieved,
       resolved
      when she left home
       hoping to have
      a better life abroad.
      
      And I
       began to breath.
      And art
       and rhyme
      came where they should have always been -
       the forefront of my life.
      
      
      Then over 20 years passed -
       and lo! -
      she found me...
       Whatever for?
      
      She was the same,
       the philistine showing off sort
      trying to put me down
       to Earth
      with all her force...
      
      - Oh, I've been to New York.
      Did you see that?
      
      She was frustrated
      when she saw my work,
      smashed totally
      by my success -
      especially by a letter
      from Josef Brodsky,
      the Noble Prize winning po-
      et,
       inside the cover of my book...
      
      
      But I was changed,
      I wouldn't have let myself hang on the same old hook.
       I blocked her.
      I didn't want to stand
       all that again.
      
      
      So... in my last night's sleep
       she came to Moscow,
      wanted to see some film or play.
      And I agreed to come along,
      although I was in disarray...
      
      She didn't come alone,
       but with a friend.
      
      They both sat in the second row -
       a baby in the lap,
      and next to them -
       a tiny dog
      in a special box.
      
      So what?
      
      They were like twins
       sharing the same lot.
      
      But I was different...
       I'd left the theatre
      before the play began.
      
      But why I saw her in my sleep again?
      
      Is it because she's thinking 'bout me
       or maybe following my way
      searching through Internet...?
      Wow! Gee!!!
      
      
      
      Jan. 30, 2024
      
      
      P.S. There, in the States,
       she changed her man again
      and once again...
       Two of them died,
      but the father
       of her son
       who's also there
      is alive.
       She'd rather
      have him back,
       but time...
      
      Back then, in Moscow,
       he felt so uncertain,
       nervous,
      unfulfilled...
      
      He criticized my poet-
       ry,
      did all he could
       to block my ways...
      
      But why I should
       have paid
      a homage to him...
      
      And who could
       stop my creative spirit
      that was coming - ay!!! -
       to me
      just like an avalanche!
      Oh, my!!!
      
      When I was only going
       to start that "friendship" -
      why
       and what for! - God warned me,
       but back then,
      during that time
       I was so weak and broken...
      and could not bare that desolation anymore...
      
      Later
       I learned
       to be alone...
      
      And now
       I feel quite comfortable
      in my life
       communicating
      with my kind
       of peo-
       ple
       who are promoting my art
      and poet-
       ry...
      
      I don't need friends like her
      or
      her son's father
      I'd rather live without them,
      I'm another...
      
      
      Jan. 30, 2024
      
       https://wavesandrunways.com/2024/01/29/presenting-the-art-works-by-olga-slobodkina-von-bromssen/?fbclid=IwAR27H2rqZfCkVZVxF_SeZ7IFWu2QLWARVB-Ma9_pAcspE3wAo8hHtWiYzbQ#respond
  • © Copyright Слободкина Ольга (olga_slobodkina@mail.ru)
  • Обновлено: 08/06/2024. 7k. Статистика.
  • Стихотворение: Поэзия
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